I keep being told that fall is near or that it has already arrived, which is a lie I’d be much more likely to fall for if I couldn’t hear children playing in the pool from my apartment window. I’m a gullible person at times. As a kid, I almost believed a punk teenager who told me that a retired couple put their pet alligators in the moat at Fort Pulaski. Even back then, I couldn’t understand where the alligators’ food would come from, and the idea that an elderly couple would faithfully feed two large alligators seemed even more unlikely. What really tipped me off that I was being messed with was when he claimed they took the gators back down to Florida for the winter.
With that same skepticism, I approach several fall traditions—but I have to admit, there’s something kind of fun about the way people celebrate this time of year. Let’s start with pumpkin spice. I’ve tasted cooked pumpkin. I like pumpkin seeds. But the truth is, pumpkin itself doesn’t have much flavor. When something is labeled “pumpkin spice,” I’m convinced what the creator really means is a very tiny bit of pumpkin and a whole lot of the spices we associate with fall and winter desserts: cloves, nutmeg, cinnamon, all that good stuff. And honestly? You can find these spices year-round. So couldn’t “pumpkin spice” be something we enjoy whenever we want, not just in October and November? Still, I get the appeal—the warm, familiar scents and flavors really do make things feel a little cozier, even if the weather outside doesn’t cooperate.
Speaking of the time of year, here’s the thing: it doesn’t feel any different than the last several months. Where I live, temperatures are still reaching the 90s, and I’m still wearing shorts outside. So, no, it doesn’t feel like fall at all. To be fair, my kind has been known to wear shorts in all kinds of weather—including snow—but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s way too warm to be thinking about anything involving more than one layer. Still, I can appreciate the optimism of those who bring out their flannel shirts and hot drinks at the first hint of September. It’s almost contagious: the collective hope that, soon, the air will finally turn crisp.
Now that I’ve gotten the weather out of the way, let’s talk about holiday traditions. Thanksgiving has gotten pretty controversial lately, and before anyone starts sounding off in the comments, yes, I know my history. I know my American exceptionalist version, and I know everything else, too. Scholars far more knowledgeable than me have written about it. What I want to talk about is the time of year Thanksgiving falls on, and what it actually means in my life. Telling a sensory-avoiding person like me that I should enjoy forced socialization—on any day of the year—will never go over well. Add to that the fact that this is a busy time at work, and it’s just not the cozy, joyful holiday people like to advertise. Still, I admire the intention behind it: a pause to gather, eat good food, and reflect on the good things in life—even if it doesn’t always go as smoothly as we wish.
One of my favorite things about Thanksgiving, now that I’m older, is being able to control my own holiday environment. If I want to leave after two hours, I can—and honestly, that’s been a wonderful pressure relief valve I never knew I needed. I also love that I can experiment with the food. Some years, I make all the traditional Thanksgiving dishes and eat them as leftovers for days before and after the holiday. Other years, I’ve skipped the turkey entirely and gone for steak and potatoes, Mexican, or Italian—just because I can. This year, I’m hoping to host a Thanksgiving pizza party and see what happens. Expanding what the holiday looks like has become its own tradition for me. Even spending most of the day with my cats watching movies feels like something to be grateful for. The flexibility and freedom to do things my way have honestly made the holidays a lot more fun. And why, exactly, is this the one time of year we’re supposed to focus on gratitude? Gratitude is a genuinely helpful mindfulness practice, but why do we concentrate it so much in November? Honestly, I think there’s value in making gratitude a regular part of life—finding small things to appreciate, even on ordinary days. Maybe that’s what I’ll try to do this year: carry a little bit of that fall thankfulness with me, no matter what the thermometer says.
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